Day 22

So I am a little bit off on my training schedule, and my long runs have been shoved from Saturdays to Sundays some weeks, and yesterday was one of those days. I did 14 miles yesterday, and despite the gorgeous weather and equally gorgeous running venue, it was one of 2 of the hardest I have had yet (the other hardest was surprisingly a 5 miler- more on that some other day). I ran in this park called DW Field park, and its got a few 2-3.5 mile loops around a few lakes. Around the last 2 mile loop, though, my legs would hardly move, and I was just..trudging. When I get tired, I usually shift my focus to different groups of muscles used to run. So I start off letting my thighs do the work, then when those are tired I focus on my calves, then my feet, then my arm momentum, butt for uphill, etc. Anyway, yesterday I ran out of muscle groups and had to turn to a different focus: slurpees. The path seemed to be extra long on that last loop, but I just kept thinking "one and a half miles till slurpee" and it worked!

But more excitingly, why is my schedule messed up sometimes? Because I started a job! Yesss! I am waitressing at a restaurant my godfather owns, and so far I LOVE it. I've always wanted to waitress but I never had the guts to branch away from kid-related jobs. Training lasted 3 days, and I am about to go fulfill my first shift all on my own. I would be scared, but the two biggest fiascos possible (dropping and breaking a plate, and breaking a coffee machine) already happened on my very first day, so what do I have to worry about? That, plus my dad AND my sister are coming in separately to visit, so I know at least 2 customers that wont get mad if I screw up their orders.

Anyway, along with this job and meeting new people here, I have been thinking a lot about they way I act around people. This is going to sound really bad at first, but usually when I look at a person, I subconsciously size them up and decide whether I am better than them or not. Trust me, it's not something I consciously do, it just happens. And then that determines if I am more reserved (if I feel like they are better than me) or not (vice versa) when I approach them. Its really bizarre, and I noticed and actively began thinking about it years ago, but I still haven't really come to any conclusions. I mean, what is the standard for "better" anyway? And what aspects of a person make me think what I do? Because consciously, I really try to believe that nobody is really better than anybody, because truthfully, value is relative. There are things that are opinions like prettier and funnier, and even calculable things like faster and smarter, but these aren't really an accurate measure for better. I'm pretty sure I'm not nearly the only person who does this. Just a thought I have been rolling around lately.